A "Rae" of Hope

In the matter of two weeks I lost my grandmother and my job.

It hasn't been peachy, but God's grace keeps me going.

I do not want to talk about the job hunt anymore. I was one of the casualties that got eaten by the economic bug and for now I crawl along in the dust awaiting my perfect opportunity. I may do some online reporting in the meantime for an internet station in Dallas and I may do some subbing... I do not want to think about it at this very moment.

Rae had three funerals. I met with her family in Colleyville Friday afternoon to attend the second one. I hadn't seen this group of cousins since seventh grade. They were all so welcoming to me and we had a nice time. The funeral was very nice. I enjoyed the stories and the songs. Rae's daughter, Beth asked me to speak since she knows I like to talk, but I didn't really feel it was my place to get up at that pulpit because my stories couldn't compare to those that had lived with her. It was so great to get to catch up with Kammi and Kevin. So many years were lost... After the funeral Kammi, Kevin, Brandon and I all went to the mall to kill a few hours before meeting the entire family at Miguelitos. We had a great time just hanging out for a few hours!

Beth's stepson, Brandon - We have talked for years on Messenger and hadn't yet met!

My cousin, Kevin - A strapping young college gentleman at Texas State - Ladies, he's single!

I flew into Midland this morning to attend the burial in Snyder today... Dad, Brenda and went to Grandmommy's and visited for a bit. It is always wonderful to see her though we talk many times a week... We met the rest at the cemetery. I was in awe at the amount of my family that came in support. My grandfather was very beloved by my family... Donna, Bill, Jodi, D'Layna, Eric, Vanala and Joe Carl all showed up from Lamesa!!! The actual burial services were very nice. The preacher read some sweet passages and that was really about it. It was a very lovely little service.

After the service we just stood around to talk. D'Layna and I walked through the graves and just talked. She is my child... she is a nine year old in an old woman's body... wise beyond her years. She's been through a lot in a short number of years so she is a good lil lady... I stood there looking up at my cousins as Layna hung on my leg and Jodi had her arms around me. There was nowhere else in the world I wanted to be at that very minute. So many times I am never a touchy person... except with family. I love them beyond words. I realized jobs didn't matter and location didn't matter. One day far away maybe I will live in West Texas near them... it's all in God's hands.

D'Layna

So now I am back at Dad's for the night... flying back tomorrow... the job hunt doesn't stop. It's been a nice escape and being with family is always the best medicine. I hope Rae is up there in Heaven with Grandaddy dancing a little jig. It blows my mind in the past year we've put to rest two of my three grandmothers... I know the world is getting older, yet we always run with that tiny bit of hope they will just live forever. No matter the blood between my grandmothers I know they have made peace in Heaven. They can smile knowing the generations they have left behind are in good hands... with one another... and we are all back in one another's lives and those wasted years can now turn into bright beginnings.